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Hamilton, Penelope

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Location: Dornoch
Covering areas: Dornoch Golspie Ardgay Bonar Bridge Lairg Brora Helmsdale Ullapool Lochinver
Phone: 07793 025331
Mobile: 07793 025331
Email: This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it

About Me

Since I first discovered that there was such a thing as a Celebrant, that's what I've wanted to be and, several years later, here I am, a Celebrant, and just as happy to be able to say that as I expected to be. It's a joy to be able to help people create personal ceremonies to mark important moments in their lives and to communicate their special thought and feelings at these times.

A brief CV: an itinerant childhood abroad; mid-teens, a rural English life; University, teacher training, teaching in London; 12 years in Yorkshire with a husband and two daughters; after about 20 years' teaching, becoming a civil servant, first in Edinburgh, then in Inverness.

I can't remember a time when I believed in a god, but I used to think there might be Something - an afterlife, a spirit world. Now, I think we have one life only and we should do our best to live it to the full, with kindness towards others, because when we die that's the end. It was a relief to discover Humanism, because I was fed up with saying I didn't believe this or that, always sounding negative, and now I can say, 'I believe - I believe it's possible to live a worthwhile and ethical life without religion.' I don't object to other people having religious faith, and I hope we can be tolerant of each other. None of us truly knows who's right, after all.

Funerals

When we experienced a devastating bereavement ourselves, and we were in the first shock of grief, the people who helped us to arrange the funeral were wonderful. They were calm and professional, and they treated us compassionately, without fussing over us. They eased our pain at that terrible time and, to this day, I remember the Funeral Director and the Humanist Celebrant with warmth and gratitude.

The ceremony went well, and many of our friends and relatives told us afterwards how moved they’d been – even people who’d been worried beforehand that there would be no prayers or hymns to comfort us. They’d particularly enjoyed the Celebrant’s tribute to our daughter, in which he’d described her life and character. It had been so personal and meaningful, they said.

My aim as a funeral Celebrant is to offer others a comforting, personal, meaningful ceremony, as Chris did for us. To help a family at such a difficult time, when they’re beginning to adjust to the death of someone close to them, is satisfying – I feel honoured, moved and privileged.

In preparing the ceremony, I don’t ignore a person’s faults or failings, but refer to them in a spirit of kindness. We’re celebrating the life of a whole human being, who leaves a whole mixture of emotions and memories in the hearts and minds of everyone who knew and loved them.

I talk to the family, write the script, and ask them to check what I’ve written, because I want to make sure the ceremony is as they want it. Music and readings are chosen by the family, with advice from me if they need it.

A member of one family wrote to me after the funeral, ‘On behalf of the family, I would like to thank you for the comforting ceremony, so impressively delivered..... I think it has given many cause to reflect on how they would wish their own funeral to be conducted. Comments were uniformly positive and (we were) very appreciative of the sensitivity and personal nature of the service.’

Namings

Same Sex Affirmations

I’m very much looking forward to the day when there’s a change in the law and Registered Humanist Celebrants can conduct legal Civil Partnerships. In the meantime, if you’re planning your Civil Partnership, I’d be delighted to help you create a special Affirmation ceremony to celebrate your union.

Whether you have in mind an intimate gathering of close friends and family, or you’re planning a big party, and whether you want your ceremony to be in your home or a hotel, on a beach or in another outdoor location, I can help you plan a ceremony that’s exactly what you want. Because you can chose the words in which you declare your love and commitment for each other, and you can select the readings, music and symbolic gestures that feel right for you, your ceremony will be unique and personal, and it’ll be very enjoyable for the two of you and for your friends and family.

Weddings

How I feel about being a wedding celebrant
I love every moment of my job, from my first chat with you, the bride and groom, right through to the end of the ceremony - and then I enjoy it all over again, remembering it as I drive home.

My approach to weddings
Warm, calm and professional - that's what I try to be.

What I love most about conducting weddings
Being a reassuring presence on the day; guiding you and your guests through the ceremony; the emotions of the moment - the humour and solemnity, joy and commitment, laughter and tears.

My advice to you
Organising your wedding is much more work, and much more time consuming, than you'd anticipated..... be kind to each other, and remember why you're getting married - you love each other!

My favourite poem for a wedding
Finally, I have found a place into which I fit
perfectly, safely and securely,
with no doubts, no fears, no sadness, no tears.
This place is filled with happiness and laughter,
yet it is spacious enough to allow me to move around,
to live life and to be myself.
This wonderful place, which I never believed really existed,
I have found, finally - in your arms, in your heart, in your love.

But there are so many wonderful readings to choose from - and I usually like best the ones that you've chosen, that suit your personalities and the ceremony we've created.

My favourite music for a wedding
Well, there's nothing to beat a Piper for your entrance and exit, in my opinion, but if the bagpipes aren't to your taste, how about 'your song' (everybody has one!)?

My most unusual location to date
No other venue has been as unusual as the sheep trailer in which I conducted my first wedding.The bride and groom wanted to marry on the hill where he'd first told her he loved her, and it had been raining all week - the cleaned-up sheep trailer was the perfect venue, and I didn't even need my waterproofs and wellies!


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