Donnelly, Janet

Background and experience

I have spent most of my working life in the hospitality industry before coming to work in the NHS eight years ago. The common thread in all of my jobs has been working with people and it is always a privilege to be allowed into their lives. Travelling around the world in my earlier years has given me a wonderful insight into the diversity that exists outwith my own life and made me appreciate the contribution that we can all make to the human race.

I love the outdoors and spend as much time as possible walking and camping in the hills. I am lucky to live so close to the Cairngorms and so close to the coast as well, I get the best of all worlds. Cycling is something that I have come to fairly recently but I do admit to getting off and pushing up the big hills!

What humanism means to me

For me, humanism is all about the people and the way that we interact and affect each others lives.

Life, family and friends are the most precious posessions that we have and should be nurtured carefully and enjoyed to the full. People are what make the world go around and we all have a part to play in the way that the world works, don't underestimate the power of people!

My approach to funerals

The death of a loved one is something that we are all going to have to face at one time or another. A humanist funeral should be more than just a farewell to somebody - it should be a celebration of their life and a tribute to their achievements.

My part in this is to work with the family to really find out what made the person tick and to compose a funeral ceremony that reflects the honest realities of their life. Each ceremony is unique and that is the key. There is no standard that must be followed, for me being flexible means that the family get the ceremony that is right for them.

How I feel about being a Naming Celebrant

The arrival of a baby is a huge event in a parent's life and it is lovely to be involved in a happy occasion such as a naming ceremony.

My approach to Namings

The important thing to me is to meet the parents and of course the new arrival (s) and get a feel of what kind of ceremony would suit them best. A naming doesn't have to be a formal affair, it can be a celebration and a welcoming too. Quite often a naming ceremony happens when the 'baby' is not really a baby anymore and so the actual 'naming' part is less of an element. Once we have met and discussed what form the ceremony will take, I'll draft a ceremony and then we can work on it together to tweak it so that it is absolutely perfect. Things to consider are music, poetry, readings and whether or not you want to include 'guide parents' who are the non religious equivalent of godparents. There is no such thing as a standard ceremony, what's important is that it suits you and your family.

What I love most about Namings

It is great to be able to take the pressure off mum and dad at a time when they are inevitably a bit frazzled and to be a part of a happy family occasion.

My advice to you

Go with the flow, don't worry if it doesn't all go exactly to plan. When babies and young children are involved anything can happen!

My favourite piece of poetry for namings

My all time favourite poem for namings is 'The Owl and The Pussycat'. It's just wonderful....

My Favourite piece of music for Namings

The song 'The Bare Necessities' from 'The Jungle Book' is so bouncy and it has the added bonus that the words are quite meaningful as well. It always ends up with people singing along which is great.

How I feel about being a wedding celebrant

It is a huge privilege to be asked to take part in a couple's special day and I love working with them to make it exactly what they want, whether it is traditional, totally 'out there' or somewhere in between!

My approach to weddings

A wedding is a highly personal occasion and even if there are hundreds of guests, it is still a very intimate occasion for the bride and groom. It is important to me to meet the bride and groom first before I start to think about what form the ceremony might take. That way, I have no pre-conceived ideas of how it will go - it is always tailored to the individual bride and groom.

Whatever you want can usually be included and what is important is that it is your day - not mine!

What I love most about conducting weddings

There is nothing like the atmosphere of pure joy that ripples around a room (or a beach, or a mountain top) when the words 'husband and wife' are spoken for the first time. You can feel the happiness and that is a powerful thing, not just for me but for everyone who is there to share the celebrations.

My advice to you

This is your day so try to focus on what is important to you both rather than what other people want or expect you to do. Easier said than done I know......

My favourite piece of wedding poetry

Poetry can be incredibly moving and incredibly funny - sometimes at the same time. The best poems put succinctly those things we wish we could say but are too tongue tied to do so.

Our Yes is a yes.
Our yes is not an all right.
Our yes is not a perhaps,
Not a maybe,
Not an experiment.
Our yes is not a “well, ok”.
Our yes
Is a yes to us,
As we are
And as we can become

(Josef Dirnbeck, translated from the original in German)

My favourite piece of wedding music

You may as well ask me to choose my favourite chocolate! The best music is what is meaningful to you. My own personal favourite is Morecambe and Wise singing 'Bring me sunshine'

My favourite location for a wedding

I am an absolute sucker for weddings out of doors or by the water. I love the feeling of the sun on your face and the natural world all around. My absolute perfect location would be a deserted long white sandy beach miles from anywhere.

Anyone for Sandwood Bay......